Open House

Andrea and her office mate Katherine held an open house at their downtown Sonora space this weekend.

Climbing the steep stairs to a suite of offices above Hammond Shoe Store, I wondered what this space would look like. Cindy and I followed the sound of children's laughter and adult conversation. We found chairs set up in the hallway along with a table of goodies (chocolate covered strawberries and strangely spiraled slices of raw beets to name a few).

A quick turn at this point in the hall takes visitors into their office where amazing light flows through casement windows that open onto Courthouse Park. The light is yellow-green from the leafy boughs of trees and mingles wonderfully with the decor of the room which centers around a colorfully upholstered chair. A big cushy couch and an interesting array of artwork make the first room quite inviting. Add a small table for kids' play and a book case with baskets of art supplies and toys and you've got a perfect setting for pre-natal visits with Andrea.

Katherine's massage table sits in the center of the second room. Gauzy fabric drapes from the ceiling and once again the light in the room would coax ease and relaxation out of even the most uptight. A small closet houses a cute little sink. Both rooms have pictures of children and family which made the small children sprawling on the floor amidst grown-up chatter a clear statement about how these women combine family and work.

We planned on staying for 15-20 minutes, but the setting was so inviting we lingered for over an hour. I'm sure Andrea & Katherine will having thriving practices in this space, gifting the community with their gentle expertise.

Sunrise

A few weeks ago my grand-daughter Anna Mae, who is 11, asked me why I called my blog Twilightme. I explained to her that metaphorically, I was in the twilight years of my life and my blog was about the things I'm doing during those years. She's been learning about metaphor in her writing class at Little Red Schoolhouse, so she totally got what I was saying.

Imagine my surprise and delight when she sent me an email last night announcing the launch of her BLOG called Sunrise. Welcome to blogland Anna Mae.

15 Years

Michael and Jennie Lou celebrated their 15th wedding anniversary on October 2, 2008!

What I remember about their wedding day was waking up to their friends sleeping everywhere-- on the deck and all across the house on floors and couches. The day dawned unseasonably warm-- in the mid 90s, not unlike Oct 2 this year.

If I remember correctly, JL had spent the night at the yurt so she could have quiet contemplative time before the wedding while Michael stayed at our place amidst the social bedlam. Their friends had been cooking in our kitchen for two days, making delicious contributions for the pot-luck reception AND a gorgeous layered vegan carrot wedding cake.

At the church, my memory is mostly blurred by tears of happiness. I do remember that Michael's mom and I lit the unity candle and Raymond and I walked JL down the aisle. I remember the lovely dried flowers and apples decorating the pews, and JL and Michael kneeling before Father Ryan during the wedding mass. I remember that Culley drove in that morning from Santa Cruz and Raleigh rang the bell at St. Joseph's to announce the marriage.

At the reception, I remember Allen being the wedding "manager," making sure folks parked well on Linda Du's gravel road and driveway, that the food was arranged on tables on the covered car port, that the toast happened at the right time, and the musicians kept the music going. I remember the canopies all over Linda's lawn and my little sister taking care of my dad who wore plaid pants and was pretty shakey but smiling and joking. I remember that Mackenzie caught the bouquet.

I remember after the wedding, my friend Carol and I spent a very long time sorting through the garbage, dipping our hands into a mess of discarded cake and dripping punch cups to pull out the recyclable materials that had been mixed in with other garbage. We laughed and laughed as we worked, giggling about the marriage symbolism in digging through garbage for the recycling.

After 15 years, Michael and JL undoubtedly are conscious of huge amounts of recycled love amidst the discards of each day of married life. Congratulations dear ones!

Wordless Weekend

Split Shift

On Thursdays, Cindy and I work a split shift. I go to work at the college at 8am and leave at noon to pick up Huck and Nell at the Waldorf School. Then we go to my house. At 2, Cindy comes home from work and I go back to teach a class at the college. Then at 4:30, she takes the kids to granddaddy's for music night and I meet everyone there.

Andrea says that on Thursday afternoons we should just go about our normal home activities and that we don't have to entertain Huck and Nell, but the truth is that they entertain us. Here are some pictures to prove it. The first one shows them in a game that Huck calls "pigs in rug." Nell is sticking out the top while Huckle is sticking out the bottom. Next is sand art at the counter using a bunch of stuff Cindy got from free-cycle. After I went back to work, they made cookies with Cindy. Here they are in front of the oven watching them bake. The deal was they had to wait to eat them until they went to Granddaddy's where they would share them at music night. Huck ate all of his dinner in anticipation of the "big" cookie he had shaped just for himself.

Faith

A little over a year ago, Cindy's niece Ashley moved in with us to go to college. She loaned me a book called the Faith Club for a trip we were about to take to Hawaii. The book was by three women who lived in New York City, a Muslim, a Christian, and a Jew. Their initial intention was to write a book for children to help them understand the differences among the faiths in the aftermath of 9/11. However, once they began working on the project, they discovered that they had much to learn from one another and much to learn about themselves and their own particular religions.

Ashley was a deeply committed Christian, and we had many discussions about the differences in our faiths, for I've been a practicing Buddhist for about 20 years. Still, I was very surprised and impressed that an eighteen year old would loan me such a book--one that discussed so directly topics that have so many folks in the world at odds with one another. I knew this was a very important book.

Before we came home from Hawaii and before I finished the book, Ashely died in a car accident. Her death was one of those enormous wake up calls about the fragility of life and how it can end all too suddenly. One of the most significant outcomes of her death was a clear understanding of the importance of infusing love into every interaction with others for you never know which encounter might be the last. During the days immediately after Ashley died, I finished The Faith Club which deepened my commitment to appreciate and respect the various beliefs and practices of others. Those were powerful days of reckoning with the book and Ashley's passing tightly linked in my mind.

Several weeks ago a dear friend learned that a man she had been partnered with for 10 years had died of aortic anyuerism. They had parted ways 10 years ago and had not seen each other since, nor had they resolved their differences. My friend's sorrow shot through me. It was another reminder to not miss a single chance to set things right, to follow through on a commitment, to respond fully from a heartfelt place.

It's almost impossible to explain exactly how that event led Cindy and I to decide to take advantage of the newly passed California law that allowed us to marry . . . but therein lies the impetus for our momentous decision. The ceremony took place with Cindy's parents as our witnesses--a sweet, joyful quiet event that made us OH SO HAPPY!

Several days later, Andrea decided to invite a small group of people to a reception in our honor. The group that gathered filled me with awe, for the mix was unbelievably eclectic and a tribute to the power of good will. There were conservatives and liberals, gay and straight, Christian, Buddhist, agnostic, ages 3 to 95 toasting our marriage. Cindy and I stood among these people feeling the shaky ground upon which we all stood, our differences set aside though floating close at hand.

I thank Ashley, and the Faith Club, and my friend's ex-partner for keeping me dialed into loving. I thank Cindy's parents for always being there. I thank Andrea for her amazing capacity to love and for knowing what to do and when. And I thank Cindy, whose boundless love fills me with faith every day!

Wordless Weekend