More Gifts

The point of the 1000 gifts exercise is to notice the blessings in one's life and to let that noticing do wondrous work. When the fragility of each day is so apparent in the devastation in Japan, it feels like a privilege to notice and be grateful:

#22 yummy black tea (Keemun) in the morning with half-and-half and stevia;
#23 spiral notebooks in all sizes with lined pages;
#24 Facebook postings from family near and far that are rich with life details;
#25 a partner with superb attention to detail and diligence in managing our taxes;
#26 weeding, weeding, weeding;
#27 a lay Buddhist monk who has been my guide regarding the mysteries of life for 25 years;
#28 Sangha buddies to practice with;
#29 an Oprah Winfrey show about camping in Yosemite that was laugh-out-loud funny;
#30 Skype and spontaneous calls from my brother and sister-in-law;
#31 super wonderful audio book narrators;
#32 a dependable old Subaru Legacy;
#33 neighbor kids' voices and laughter as they wait for the bus;
#34 the unsettling of and adjustment to Daylight Savings;
#35 the rush of anticipation each time I think about our upcoming vacation;
#36 reading and tutoring the literature assigned to my grandson for 11th grade English class;
#37 listening to my son-in-law's enthusiasm (and angst) as he embarks on a new career direction;
#38 Acorn slippers

Packing for a Cruise

We don't leave for our Mexico cruise for a couple of weeks, but since we pack away seasonal clothes, we decided to bring down the boxes with shorts, tanks, and summer wear this weekend so that we could start thinking about what to bring on the trip. Now that airlines charge for luggage that is not carried on, we wanted to be thoughtful about what and how much we packed.

It wasn't long before clothes were spread all over the bed, and we were struggling into shorts that were too tight for our winter pudgy bodies. We stood before the full length mirror trying to find the best angle, wishing to see someone slimmer and more tan. Pastey white legs stretched from swim suits and belly fat hung over the edges of hip huggers. It was depressing to say the least. Cindy vowed to exercise for the next 10 days and I started an immediate fast.

Then we tried on dress-up clothes for formal night. We each found fancy outfits that totally changed our mood and made us wish we were headed for the gala evening as fast as possible. Dressed to the hilt, having also chosen fitting accessories, we stood side-by-side in front of the mirror, grinning. We knew we would look great for the last evening aboard ship and maybe if we stuck to our plan to exercise and diet, most of the other clothes would fit OK too.

When we looked back at the pile of chosen clothes on the bed, we also knew we would by paying extra for luggage.

Gifts:
#22 the lovely irridescent green skirt and top I bought for way too much money in Hawaii a few years ago, which looks good terrific when I've gained a few pounds;
#23 the wherewithall it took to save for this trip and the fact that it's almost here after a year and half of saving.
# 24 a body that actually will respond to 10 days of exercise and dieting to shape up a bit so I can wear my favorite shorts comfortably.
#25 dear Cindy who says all the right things when I'm feeling fat.

Grandparents Day at Waldorf

I can't remember if they had Grandparents Day when I was in school. Maybe there was such a day, but it meant little to me since my grandparents lived many states away, so I rarely saw them. But it means a lot to me now that I'm a grandparent who truly enjoys visiting my grand kids schools to see what they are doing, especially on a day designated for the elders in their life.

Uncle John, Cindy and I attended Grandparent's Day at the Sierra Waldorf School. Now that Huck is in Grade One, his class was part of the assembly. They kicked off the program by reciting a wonderful poem about a beetle and then did the entire poem again silently using hand gestures. Grade One was followed by the other grades in ascending order, which gave those of us in the audience a taste of the future. It was like watching children grow right before your eyes.

After the program, Grade Eight students escorted us to the classrooms of the children we were visiting. We went to Huck's class where he displayed two beautiful portfolios, one for math concepts and one for reading concepts. His art work was colorful and imaginative, and he took pleasure in sharing each page with us. We didn't think Huck had spotted us in the audience during the assembly, but we were wrong. He had been looking out for us just as we were looking for him.

Then we went to preschool where we sat behind Nell as the class said a blessing for the soup and bread they were about to serve. Miss Beth directed Nell to distribute napkins to guests and her friend Richard to pass out spoons. Then each child served their special guests. Can I just say that watching 4 and 5 year olds carry bowls of hot soup took my breath away. Fear and admiration were the compelling emotions. Every bowl was delivered without a drop spilled. After lunch, the children sang the good-bye song they sing each day as they take leave of their friends and teacher. Finally the children collected our dishes and headed out to the porch to wash and dry them.

Nell gave us big scrumptious hugs good-bye before leaving with Uncle John to collect Huck and go home. I am so glad I live down the road from the Sierra Waldorf School rather than states away.

Gifts
#19 two grand kids attending a school I would love to have sent my kids to;
#20 Miss Beth's tender attention to those 2 children these past 3 years;
#21 The marvelously serene and talented teacher Waldorf found for Grade 1 at midyear (wish I could recall her name) . . .

1000 Gifts

I'm joining my daughter, daughter-in-law, and granddaughter in listing the gifts --the multitude of blessings--that are a part of my life on a daily basis. The value of thanksgiving--of expressing gratitude--is the rapidity with which hit erases poverty mind. In a flash, the heart swells with tenderness. In her book, One Thousand Gifts: A Dare to Live Fully Right Where You Are, Ann Voskamp calls it a dare list--daring to acknowledge the grace in one's life.

Let my list begin:

#1 bird song at dawn
#2 hot baths and ibuprophen
#3 sweet messages, handwritten and electronic, from my partner
#4 someone who balances my checkbook
#5 granddaughters who greet me with genuine enthusiasm
#6 a phone call from a friend I haven't heard from in a while
#7 reading poetry as the sun rises over Table Mountain
#8 three exceptional yoga instructors, Cherie, Christian, Dee
#9 texts and email from my sons
#10 sharing confidences with my daughter
#11 the DVR that records my favorite TV programs
#12 pink blossoms on 3 ornamental plum trees again a back drop of blue sky
#13 aching muscles, the result of shoveling bark
#14 enjoying the lovely results of shoveling bark around new plantings
#15 the talking tail of my cat
#16 morning fog rolling into the meadow from the reservoir
#17 the steady tick of the burl clock our neighbor gave us.
#18 the rolling fire trail around our mobile home park that offers a place to exercise, constantly changing vistas, and innumerable wildlife sightings.

Fear & Adernaline Poisoning

On Saturday night, I had a harrowing experience that sent adrenaline coursing through my bloodstream with toxic effects. Here's what happened:

The day involved meeting Cindy's family in Fresno to see the movie Secretariat followed by dinner at the Chuckchansi Casino in Coarsegold. Sure, this was a lot of driving but also great catchup time for Cindy and me. After dinner at the buffet (a delicious stir fry for me), I left Cindy gambling with some of her family while I headed out to trek the curving foothill roads of Highway 41 and 49 to her parent's home in Mariposa.

As I approached the truck in the parking lot, I noticed that the left front tire was low, so I drove to a nearby gas station to air up. However, the air dispenser was out of order. The next station was 5 miles away, so I headed down the road to get the air I needed. Shortly after I left that station, a red light came on: "Check Gauges." I couldn't see that anything was off (though later learned I was misreading the battery charge gauge), so I kept going but pulled into a shopping center in Oakhurst after I turned onto Highway 49 and called Cindy. After a brief discussion, we decided I should drive on to Mariposa as we could not discern what was wrong.

I drove another 5 miles and another light came on. This one said "Air Bag." I could not figure out what was going on until I was heading down a steep, curving incline, a 2-mile drop into the river canyon, and noticed that the headlights were incredibly dim and then non-existent. I was driving in the dark with a car fast approaching behind me. I hit the brakes again and again, hoping the brake lights were working. The lights in the car behind cast an eeire shadow of my truck on the road ahead making it difficult to see. I barrelled downhill, headed for a narrow bridge that crossed the river. CLUNK--a noise reverberated through the car, and the power steering was gone. I sailed across the bridge in a frightening float-coast. Spotting a driveway just past the end of the bridge, I managed to maneuver into its entrance and stopped barely off the road. Five or six cars zipped past me at breakneck speed.

Coursing with adrenalin, my hands shaking badly, I tried to make the flashers come on without success. I reached behind the seat looking for a flashlight that I knew was stored there. In the dark of the cab, I frantically pulled stuff forward, dumping a mess all over the front seat. The truck was still running and cars were speeding past. I was shaking uncontrollably and felt like I was going to throw up that delicious stir fry. When there was a break in the traffic, I backed up by moonlight into the driveway, skimming by a row of mail boxes. Then I turned the car off and reached for my cell phone. No coverage in that canyon. Every nerve ending was alive in my body, twitching and shuddering.

I was eventually rescued with the help of a good samaritan and coordination by Cindy from a far, but the lesson about the effects of fear and adrenaline will stay with me. I didn't stop shaking until 30 minutes after I was in a safe place, and I was sick for hours from the adernaline rush, nauseated, head aching, and unable to sleep. I kept feeling myself rushing down that hill with no lights or steering and a weird shadow out in front of me. Adrenaline poisoning is surely a factor in post traumatic stress syndrome.

This tap on the shoulder by fear fills me with compassion for those who live in terror or are momentarily brushed by horror. My harrowing experience was brief with a very positive outcome, but it gave me a vivid taste of what fear does to one's body and spirit.

Bottled Water Withdrawal

Today is Blog Action Day. Bloggers around the world are writing about water as a global issue.

I'm taking the stance: think globally, act locally.

By local, I mean right here in my own sweet home, or rather by my personal action. You see, I've been working not too successfully for two years to STOP using bottled water. I wrote the following statement on my annual goals for 2009 and 2010. "I will consistently use my Kleen Kanteen to carry water with me."

Notice that I had to write it two years in a row. That's because I did not manage to do this in 2009, and it now that it is October 2010, I can say that I'm not faring much better this year. But with this post and this day-- Blog Action Day-- I'm recommitting myself.

WHY?

FACT 1: In the US, we buy an average of 200 bottles of water per person per year.
FACT 2: 17 million gallons of oil a year are needed to produce these plastic bottles.
FACT 3: More than 86% of those bottles are not recycled.

Here's the thing. Somehowm my taste buds tell me that the bottled water tastes better than our tap water. However, according to Annie Leonard who wrote the book The Story of Bottled Water, "Companies like PepsiCo, Coca-Cola and Nestle, the big three water bottlers, are actually sucking municipal water systems for the product they bottle and sell back to us for hundreds and even thousands of times the cost."

So I've been duped. The solution? I simply need to train my mouth to enjoy the water from the tap that I put into my Kleen Kanteen. And I can do that by consistently drinking from my Kleen Kanteen.

By so doing, I subtract my infinitesimal numbers from those in FACTS 1, 2, & 3.

I offer this tiny sacrifice to :

3.6 million people who die each year because they don't have clean water to drink and 4,000 children younger than 5 who die every day from preventable, water-borne diseases.

Milestone

This post heralds one of those milestone moments. My eldest grandchild got his driver's license today.

Three of his siblings, his mother, and I waited inside the DMV office while he was taking the test. When I spotted him through a window on the other side of the office returning with the examiner, the HUGE grin on his face told me he had PASSED!

An obvious milestone for August, one of those markers on the way to adulthood, it is also one those countable moments for his mother and grandmother. As I get older, the notable events in this family pile up-- graduations, performances, sporting events, and all manner of firsts: first day of school, high school, the first lost tooth, first bike ride without training wheels. And now this: first solo drive. I count every event as remarkable as in worthy of notice and attention. Each milestone, each first, gives me a thrill. . .

. . . and also new possibilities. August will be driving to my place tomorrow to help me clean the rain gutters.